I am Always Late

For the last two-three decades, the changes in our life resulted from technological development were more than miraculous. Internet, computers, notebooks, e-mails, smartphones, Wi-Fi and bluetooth technology, flash cards: is it possible to imagine our life without them? That is why we all love technology. However, specialists do not stop warning us that we rely on the latest technological achievements and innovations too much. The truth is: all those devices and inventions were made to help us to save our time. But very often they play a role of very powerful time killers and cause a lot of unwanted stresses. Let’s take a closer look at this problem.

For some years, my friend Carla worked as a secretary in Precision Intermedia, a huge marketing agency. Every time when I used to meet her she was complaining about one of senior managers in her company. He was always extremely busy and unreachable, but when she used to tell him that she could not contact him on time, he never accepted that as an apology. “Look, you have 5 ways to reach me at any time. I have my mobile phone, which is never off. I have my personal assistant who is always next to me. I have a phone on my office-table which also works fine. Finally, I have 2 business e-mail addresses and I check them out every hour from my PPC. I will never believe that all these communication channels failed at the same time.” What to say?

Undoubtedly, every technology and every innovation has positive and negative sides. For example, using e-mails substantially facilitates and fastens communication, as well as lowers its costs. However, numerous viruses and spam messages we receive through e-mail damage our computers and affect our productivity. Mobile connection allowed people to stay in touch with each other regardless of the distance and other circumstances. At the same time, using mobile phones has negative effects on our health and also affects our productivity. The same can be said about using Internet or PPC. It is obvious that we must keep using technological developments under control, and here are some recommendations for those who want to be less dependent on technological failures:

1. Be sure that you use full capacity and all functions of your devices or technologies. Do not keep any device or technological tool only because it is a brand new and fashionable one, but can not satisfy all your professional or personal needs. Avoid using the technologies which can not bring the expected utility, otherwise you will lose more than win.

2. Always look for more information about your new device or technology. My dad had to spend 4 hours to learn using his mp3-player because he was feeling shy to bother other people and asking for directions. Spare your time and ask your friends, relatives, shop assistants, distributors about new functions and new opportunities that can be opened to you by using your new device or technology.

3. Update your technology. Just a decade ago our mobile phones were quite simple and could offer us hardly something more than just mobile connection. Now, we can use these devices as a photo camera, internet service provider, file storage and God knows what else. If you have the latest model of Samsung or Nokia mobile phone with a powerful high zoom camera, give up using your old digital camera: at least you will save your money and time for battery replacement.

I hope that this article did not make you think that I am an opponent of technology. Technological innovations and inventions are doing a great job for the humanity, and technology is extremely useful until it does not stop helping people to progress and advance. So, technology itself can not be blamed, the problem is us. In our epoch of multiplicable gigabytes, increasing number of web-sites and space ships, a great deal of people use too many various devices and technologies in their daily life. As a result, we frequently spend our time on less important things and sometimes even waste those precious minutes and hours of our life for solving various avoidable technical problems.

We always say “I have no time for this, I have no time for that…” However, many of us know so well that we spend a lot of time for noting. Watching TV and spending time in traffic jams are supposed to be the most common “time killers”. But, actually, there are so many more of them… Many of us have own sites or blogs, and the majority of such site owners are infected with the virus called “checking out the Statcounter“. Some of us tend to check out recent visitors activity every 15 minutes. What for? Certainly, to kill the time…

There are internal and external time killers. External ones include all factors or circumstances, which grab our attention easily and make us lose control of our time. The list of such time killers is quite long:

• Delays when leaving home (looking for the keys, etc.)
• Delays on the way to the work (traffic jams, etc.)
• Chatting with the colleagues
• Using MSN and other IMs
• Problems with the PC and Internet connection
• Looking through spam messages in your e-mail box
• Looking for files, pens, coffee cups, etc.
• Talking on the phone
• Vendors and visitors
• Smoking and coffee breaks
• Surfing on the net and reading various blogs
• RSS and various e-mail subscriptions, and so on

In addition to all those external time killers, there are also internal ones: all the factors connected with your personal traits which cause delays, problems at work, stresses and other unwanted side effects. Inner time killers are actually our habits and the parts of our life, therefore, it is usually harder to get rid of them. They commonly include such things as:

• Our inability to say “No”
• Our tendency to doing a lot of things at the same time
• Our inability to estimate the time necessary for competing one or another assignment
• Our desire to be useful and help everyone around us
• Our natural tardiness
• Our drive to communication
• Our neglect to making notes
• Our habit to start our work without thinking properly about all necessary resources
• Our inability to prioritize
• Our usual lack of normal sleep and rest
• Our habit to rely completely on our memory
• Our natural absence of mind
• Our habit to procrastinate and leave important tasks for the end of the day
• Our bad habits, such as smoking, snaking and so on.

The list is quite impressive, isn’t it? Some of these habits are sourced from our social norms of behavior. For example, if a colleague comes to ask for some little help, it is considered rude to refuse. Moreover, such factors are taken as parts of our working routine. However, sometimes we really waste a lot of time for walking along the corridor to prepare a drink, or looking for office-manager to get some blank paper sheets, etc.

Is it possible to get rid of all these time killers? Sure thing it is. But the key point is: in order to win the battle against time killers, it is necessary to fully understand the problem. We have to admit being dependent on time killers and acknowledge that they are really strong and powerful enemy to fight against. This understanding can help us to achieve maximum effectiveness and productivity. Remember that killing the “time killers” is a very important and necessary step toward effective time management and optimization.

This time, my friends, let’s look closer at the main problem of the majority of us, Her Majesty Laziness. Nowadays, there are quite a lot of various techniques and strategies to assist people in fighting against laziness. They are available online or in a specialized literature. Once upon a time, while surfing on the Internet, I came across one interesting and very easy tactic to overcome my laziness. This technique really worked for me, and the most important fact is: it actually does not require any special state of mind, excessive enthusiasm or will power, any special preparation or knowledge. The tool I want you to try is something that can be easily done even by the laziest person on earth.

However, let me begin with talking about several myths connected with our laziness. To be proper, two of the myths, which do not allow many people understand better their laziness and start their battle against it. Here we go: it is supposed that laziness is an ineradicable personal trait. This is not true, because laziness is actually a special behavioral pattern, a habit, which certainly can be changed. Another myth is connected with the definition of laziness. We usually think that “Laziness is a condition when I am not doing anything“. This is so very wrong, because when we are lazing, we can be eating, watching a TV, listening to music, talking on the phone, playing a PC game, reading books, etc. etc. All of those are actions, and real laziness is the condition, when those activities start taking 6-12 hours a day and affecting our life. Therefore, laziness means being involved in quite useless activities (to some extent) for very long time.

Now, let’s get closer to the point. The tactic we are going to test has a certain mission: in order to beat laziness we can try not doing anything. Let’s suppose that you have something urgent or important to do, but you feel lazy to do that. It’s ok. First of all, let’s apply the strategy we were talking about before, and make a plan. You should schedule your activity, so take a piece of paper and write down on it, when you are going to start doing the task and for how long you are going to be busy with it. For example, “Today from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m.” or “Tomorrow from 9 a.m. to 11 a.m.” The most probably, when the mentioned time has come, you start feeling lazy again. What actually do you need to do to fight with it?

Ok: when the scheduled time came, give up doing what you were doing before, get up from your place and stand in the middle of the room (standing is better than sitting or laying down, I hope you understand why!). Do not do anything and just go with the flow of your thoughts, until you start feeling like you are ready to start doing the task you planned to do. Not doing anything and just standing still is quite unpleasant and hard, so it will eventually come to your mind that you need to start doing your task. So, take your time for choosing from two alternatives: the thing you need to do, or doing nothing, From my own experience, I can tell you that the longest it took me to stand and wait for the inspiration to come, was 5 minutes. Hint: do not think about how complicated and long the task can be, just think about doing the first step. It’s like pressing “Start” button on your computer: find the way to begin, and it will be easier to proceed.

You can apply the same tactic in the situation, when you start feeling lazy in the middle of doing you task or assignment. Go back to the room and stand still doing nothing for a while. Believe me, very soon you will feel like being back to your task. This technique is applicable for any sort of tasks or activities, in any situation. And it’s advantage is: there is no need in making extra efforts or persuading yourself that you need to start working on something. Moreover, do not try to control your thoughts and just go with the flow. Most probably, inspiration and motivation will come soon. Good luck!

Every second we make a choice connected with doing or not doing something. Certainly, these choices have certain influence on our future. Very frequently we have to enter a fight against ourselves in order to achieve one or another important goal. This fight is for making ourselves do the things we do not want to do, or avoid doing the things we would like to do, in order to advance in this life, achieve success, obtain or win something, improve our reputation and so on. In terms of such fight, an effective self-motivation can be one of the most powerful weapons of ours. Below you can find some tips on boosting your self-motivation and achieving your goals.

1. Everything you do and any of your decision should lead to a certain result, directly or indirectly. The way you organize all your activities influences your self-motivation to a great extent. Try to organize your daily routine and activities in such a way that you will enjoy doing everything you have to or decided to do.

2. Try to select the most important ONE goal and work on achieving it without spending your time and efforts for something else. One of the most common mistakes is trying to achieve many goals and doing a lot of not important things to achieve those goals. Too many goals always take too much time to achieve. That is why it is essential to choose only one goal (for the moment) and do everything possible to achieve it.

3. It is very important, especially in small things or actions, to minimize the time between making a decision about something to be done, and actually doing that. If you say to yourself “I should do that”, it means that you set up a goal of doing something for uncertain time. It can unconsciously leave a feeling of something undone and some discomfort connected with this. It is the best to complete the task as soon as it is possible and not to look for the reasons to feed your laziness.

4. Do not think about possible difficulties or obstacles. Instead, think about how useful it will be, the thing you need to do. Thinking about good and positive sides of what you are about to do can be a good self-motivation. You should have a clear picture of what you are trying to achieve, and thinking about your goals will help you to find the most effective ways to attain it.

5. Look for someone’s support. If you face difficulties when doing something, find someone who can help you. Find an apprentice or a partner. However, sometimes it is good to find a competitor: a good competition is a very powerful motivator.

6. Make a public promise to achieve something. Take this responsibility and, if you are a man of your word, you will have no other way but doing what you have promised to do and achieve what you have promised to achieve.

7. Try to find some inspiration. It can be a book or a personal story of one of your friends. Sometimes we feel motivated for doing absolutely impossible things after only listening to a song or watching a movie.

8. Be always sure that you will succeed, and never say to yourself “Oh, I’ll never make it!” If the task you need to complete is very difficult and bulky, try to begin with small things. Every long way starts with a small step, followed by many many other steps, big and small. The main thing is to start. Even if you have a lack of time to move toward your goal, you can spend just 5 minutes every day. Collect your small achievements, one to one, and after every small victory you will feel positive and optimistic. Go on moving along the path towards your goals, step by step. Soon, when you turn back, you’ll see that there’s quite a long way behind you…

If you are trying to get rid of your laziness and change your life, it is very important for you start to value your time. Every day we are involved in hundreds of various activities, have a lot of duties, obligations, chores, entertainment activities and other things to do, so learning what we actually spend our time for could be very effective for us to estimate, how much of time is usually spent on unimportant and useless things. Knowing this will, undoubtedly, help us to maximize our effectiveness, avoid work overload, reduce stresses and achieve better personal and professional success!

My friend Carla is a secretary assistant, she works in a huge marketing company in Northern California and spends her time mostly in the office in front of her PC, answering calls or requests, and helping the employees with their daily routine. Once she decided to change her life, the first thing she did was writing down all her regular activities and how much time was spent for every each of them. She has been keeping records of every little thing she was doing for 7 days, including even going to the rest-room, and in the end of the ends, she summarized and calculated the total time for everything done. The results were really shocking for Carla.

She found out that she was spending 3,5 hours a week looking at herself in the mirror while doing make-up, fixing her hair or just looking at her face!! Another 3 hours were spent for idle drinking coffee, consuming doughnuts and chatting with her colleagues. 15 hours were spent for surfing Internet and chatting with her online friends (not too very useless activity though, but 15 hours is too much). More than 9 hours were spent for various relaxing activities in the office (reading magazines, checking out e-mails or playing PC games). Almost 7 hours were spent in some shopping-malls and markets while doing shopping for personal entertainment. Finally, watching TV proved to take about 10 hours of her time every week. Therefore, she realized that she actually had 48 more hours a week available for more effective and useful activities! Believe it or not, this little research really changed her attitude toward her personal time.

I know that some very conservative companies ask their employees to keep records of all their activities and submit such reports later on for the consideration of the top managers. Well, I personally think that it is too much, but it is hard to deny that this simple and effective technique can help to understand that everyone needs to value our own time. It really works for many people! Try it, do a little study of the way you spend your time, and you will definitely find out something to think about. And remember that knowing how we spend our time is only a little step ahead: the most important thing is to start feeling sorry and unhappy for every minute wasted… Our time and our life is in our own hands.

Your sister asked you to babysit her child, your boyfriend calls you every night and makes you listen to his mindless jokes, your colleague regularly asks you to cover up for her or help her to finish the report as soon as possible, your best friend is looking for a job and repeatedly asks you to talk to your boss about him. Isn’t this familiar to you? “No” is such a simple word, which, however, is sometimes very difficult to say instead of “I’ll be glad to help you!” How many times you have said “yes” and agreed to do something which is not important to you? In how many situations you should have said “no” but felt responsible or polite to the others? Tell me truly, was it always the best solution, to say “yes“?

One of the first rules for those, who want to learn how to prioritize, is to get rid of enforced things and “duties”. You should learn to say “no” in those situations, when the others try to force you to do something that is not in your plans or has nothing to do with your personal goals and values. Learn to set personal boundaries and protect your own sanity, otherwise you will soon feel exhausted and overloaded with your own issues and your “obligations” to help, to be there, to listen, to look after, and so on. Be selective and choose only the battles you truly want to fight for other people. Do not go with the flow, and only in such case you will be able to achieve your personal and professional goals.

Now, you can say “Wait! You want me to say “no” to my friends and people who really need my help in order to save my time? You want me to ignore their needs and earn a fame of a hard-hearted and ill-mannered person?” And I will say – “No!“This is the last idea I would like to promote, because in our daily life we do really need to help and support our friends and close people a lot. All I want you to understand is that saying “yes“to never ending non-critical daily demands that are re-placed onto your shoulders can take your attention off your own priorities, affect your chances to achieve success and limit your personal freedom to a great extent!

Certainly, reliable people who are always ready to assist and support are of a great value in any society, however, there must be limits. Moreover, frequently your friends do not seem to appreciate your readiness to help at any time. That is why you must learn compromise. Certainly, when it is really necessary and does not ruin your plans, you can babysit your niece one day or talk to your boss about your friend as a new potential employee. This way you will demonstrate your love and concern about your close people. However, if you can not do this by some reason, do not be afraid to say “no“, politely but assertively.

Our society is stricken with “a disease to please“, that is why saying “no” is strictly connected with certain fears of breaking down the people we love by refusing to help them, as well as fears of hurting someone’s feelings or being rejected for such behavior. The only way to prevent all these negative effects of saying “no” is to deliver the message in the most effective way. There are some tips for those, who want to master this effective technique:

• Do not accompany your “no” with weak and unrealistic excuses. Ask for some time to think over the request and find the most rational and clear supportive arguments for your negative answer.
• In some situations it makes sense not to say “no” directly, but use some verbal signs to demonstrate your negative response. However, if you know that the person you are dealing with can be too very insistent and will go on bothering you all the time, it is better to say a direct and assertive “no“. Moreover, for some people only aggressive “no” will work: “Are you kidding? Me, picking your laundry on Sunday morning while you are out of town?“
• Use logical explanations for your negative answers. Make a person understand that there is something more important to you than the request. “You know, I would gladly give you a lift, but Mrs. Hauer have asked me to pick her up, and you truly hate each other, don’t you?“
• Use non-verbal signs to show the person that you do not really want to do what is requested. Speak with a firm and assertive voice and look into the person’s eyes when saying “no“. Be honest and polite. Some of the best ways to start your speech are: “I’m sorry, but I must turn down your request this time because…” or “Oh, I wish I could help you now, but…“

Do not think that a refusal to give a hand to other people with their daiy duties is something to be ashamed of or feel guilty about. Saying “no” is an honorable answer! You and only you are the master of your personal time, and nobody else has a right to trench upon your time and use it for satisfying own needs. Learn to say “no” and be ready to hear “no” from other people as well. However, the effects can be really positive: you will be valued and respected for your “yes” and for your “no“. The main idea is to make people around you understand that saying “no” does not turn a person into your enemy.

“I want it all, and I want it now!” Freddie Mercury was singing in one of the best songs of Queen in the late 80s. Yes, people want to have a lot of things: an interesting and non-stressful job, a loving family, plenty of money, a well-appointed house, caring and well-educated children, loyal friends, good health and God knows what else. However, no matter how hard we try, the truth is: we have no time for everything! Sooner or later we have to stop and decide what we want the most: a distinguished career, or a long purse and deep pocket, or a homely home, or our personal freedom. Sooner or later we have to make a choice, and effective time management can also help us to set our priorities.

Undoubtedly, the concept of prioritizing is one of the key ideas of the whole time management theory – it is one of its foundation stones! Prioritizing means making choices, what to do right now and what not to do. Well-developed prioritizing skills and abilities to evaluate, what task is the most important in a certain period of time, are crucial for every successful person and for those, who want to achieve long-term goals. Prioritizing also can help us distinguish between urgent, the most important and the most rewarding tasks, and learn to focus on them.

In time management books and theories, there are many ways and techniques of complex prioritizing, which include various matrixes or using 5-6 criteria for evaluation of the tasks. Well, in order to save our time and not to get confused in this everything, I offer using a very simple model, which always works for me and will, certainly, work for you, my dear readers. This model is very simple and can be used at any time and for any type of tasks or activities you need to do. This is basically how it works.

1.    Make a list of everything that must be done or you want to be done for a certain period of time (a working day, a week, a year, etc.). Remember, that making a written list of the tasks or activities is very effective for the beginners, that is why write down every thing that comes to your mind!
2.    Evaluate every single task and activity in your to-do list. Ask yourself a question: “Will something terrible happen if I don’t accomplish this item as soon as possible?” “Is this really something that MUST be done no matter what?” If the answer is “Yes“, then this item is an A Priority item, the highest priority task or activity.
3.    If the task is important, rewarding and quite urgent, but still can be postponed for some time, it belongs to the second category, or B Priority.
4.    All the rest of the tasks and activities in your list have to be considered C Priorities, or not important items. Ask yourself, “Will something happen if I don’t accomplish this item at all?” If the answer is “No”, you can leave these tasks for better times.

That’s all. Everything you need to do is to learn setting the priorities on a regular basis and spending your time only for doing those tasks, which fall under your A and B categories. This model can assist you greatly in distinguishing those tasks, which will make you closer to your goals and stimulate your personal progress day by day, from the other, less useful and important duties or activities.

Unfortunately, many of us feel lazy to spend time for prioritizing. We do a great deal of things and tasks that appear in our working schedules or are a part of our daily routine and simply need to be accomplished, without asking questions about the priorities. However, prioritizing is a very important approach which effectively works for improving productivity, achieving better results and higher time efficiency, being focused only on important tasks and more oriented on long-term goals, and so on.

Along with lack of motivation, such factors as vagueness, uncertainty and lack of clarity are among the key reasons of our bad habits, discouragement and procrastination. For those who are determined to fight with these problems and look for positive changes in their life, I would like to offer a strategy created by Dr. Brian Tracy, an experienced time management specialist, lecturer and business coach, who wrote several books of special techniques and recommendations for those who suffer from chronic procrastination and lack of personal effectiveness. He argues that everyone who wants to be successful in this world has to define own goals and aspirations. This can be done in the following 7 steps:

Step 1. Decide, what exactly do you want to achieve in this life, where do you want to be and what do you want to possess? Specifying your goals and your strategies to achieve them will help you in one important thing: to avoid doing useless, low value tasks and wasting your time and efforts. “One of the very worst uses of time is to do something very well that need not be done at all”, Tracy says.

Step 2. Think on paper. Try to write down at least 10 goals you want to achieve within the next year. Make them clear and crystallize them on paper. Now you see that by writing them down, your dreams and goals turned from fantasies into something tangible and real, didn’t they?

Step 3. Estimate an optimistic deadline and a pessimistic deadline for your goals. If your goal has no fixed time limits, it loses its relevance and urgency. You have to establish clear time frames for achieving your goals and assume the responsibilities not to procrastinate all the time, but work on this day by day.

Step 4. Think about everything you need to do, learn or accomplish in order to achieve your goals, and make a list of the findings. This will, definitely, make your goals closer to you. Also, this list will give you a picture of the most important or the largest tasks you need to accomplish on your way to every goal.

Step 5. Organize the list of the findings by priority and time sequence. You can use charts, boxes or circles. This plan will help you to increase your productivity and efficiency, so you will definitely be more successful than anyone who carries his goals in the mind.

Step 6. Take action! Find something that you can do right away in order to get closer to your goals at least for an inch. You can arrange a meeting with your future business partner, or find some important online information for your project. Do anything right away!

Step 7. Make a habit of doing something that will move you toward achieving your goals every single day. Learn something new every day, get engaged in specific activities or discussions, and involve more and more people in your projects. Keep moving forward and do not miss a day!

In my previous articles I was mentioning motivation as the main moving force for personal development and success. It is quite obvious that if a person is not enough motivated and challenged to do something, he or she will not struggle to succeed, as well as never feel sad for lost opportunities. Now, we are about to learn the second not less important factor which frequently causes our absolute indifference and poor self-discipline. This factor is lack of clarity: a lack of clear and specific goals, and lack of understanding what we want to achieve, when and in what way.

It is reported that only 3-5% of people have clear realistic written goals and objectives for their life. Such people are supposed to be more confident and more determined on their way to achieving those goals. They are also considered to be more reliable, more pragmatic and precise, and they usually have fewer problems with estimating the time for accomplishing their tasks. Finally, they are supposed to be more successful.

That is why time management specialists recommend to write down your specific long-term goals on a piece of paper, then write down your short-term goals, and then do all that “scheduling” thing, specify the deadlines for every step, etc. They say that this will be your roadmap to success. Well, this idea can sound useless and quite senseless to many people, especially to those who have some unclear and “standard” goals in their mind, like “I will buy a better car when I get paid for this project” or “I will start a diet and lose 10 pounds till the end of this year”. I understand those people, and I admit that they can live their life happily without any planning and scheduling on paper.

All I want to ask you now is just giving a clear answer to yourself: do you have some certain ambitions or aspirations in your life? What are you trying to achieve in this life? What is you life? Is it like going with the flow and sitting on fence, or like looking for something special and helping other people to feel comfortable in this world? Where do you want to be in 10 or 20 years? What do you need to do for that? It is not for scheduling or planning something, it is for yourself. Take a break from your daily routine for a minute, sit down and think about your future, your goals and reasons you live this life for. Also, try to understand that the clearer your goals are, the easier it will be for you to overcome your procrastination and laziness, learn being successful and find your place among the most productive people of your generation.

1. When you need to do something that is really important, you usually try to escape from doing that by finding something else to do that is not less important. Moreover, you start truly believing that new tasks are really more topical than the one you don’t want to do. If this situation is typical for you, you have to start working on increasing your motivation and boosting your self-control.

2. Our laziness likes the words “here” and “now”. Chronic lazy people rarely think about tomorrow and about their future, they mostly live in the present and care only about today. Also, they always give promises to themselves to start a new life, to do this and that, etc. etc… But tomorrow everything repeats again and again. If you can not do anything about your laziness, I can offer you, for example, to lay a bet with someone that you can do something special, something great and newsworthy. Maybe, this trick will open new horizons for you….

3. Do you know that our laziness needs some creephole or crawlway to sneak in on you? It can not come up at any time and any place. For example, if you are hungry for two days, you laziness will not stop you from looking for a meal. Or, if you have an exam tomorrow, you will most probably feel anxious and look through some textbooks or notes. Therefore, in order to win the fight against laziness, you need to set up very ambitious goals and give your laziness no chances to find that crawlway to approach you.

4. Many specialists tend to suppose that our laziness is an acquired individual trait that depends on the way our parents educate and bring us up.  However, if you were not lucky with proper education and training in your childhood, you can open your way to changing yourself. It is difficult, but if you really want to get better and achieve more success in your life, you must do everything possible and learn to struggle against the stream of laziness.

5. Always remember that laziness is very infectious. If you join a group or a company where everybody is lazy, there is no doubt that soon you will get buried in sloth, too. Try to do everything possible to avoid such groups and never model your conduct on lazy people.

6. If you are not an irresponsible teenager anymore, but your obscene laziness still overrules you, so you mostly do what you want and not what you need to do, you must have unconscious unpleasant impulses in your mind: hidden feelings of guilt and remorse. And, whether you want this or not, there is a certain war of motifs in your mind that results in growing feeling of uncertainty, discontent or unfulfilled opportunities. Do not let this all hang out, cos’ these things can cause certain psychological problems and traumas…