I am Always Late

I think, there is hardly a person in the world who is not familiar with the following situation. Early morning, your alarm clock is ringing, you wake up and the first thought that comes to your mind is something like this: “Oh, no! It was such a great dream that I was seeing… I’ll stay in bed just two minutes more, nothing is going to change for just two minutes…”

Or, there’s another typical situation. You are watching your favorite Martha Stewart or Ellen DeGeneres Show. You look at your clock and see that it is time for you to start getting ready for going out for a meeting, for a lecture or for a party, but you enjoy watching the show so much and can’t find motivation to give up watching. This is a typical fight between the things we have to do and the things we truly enjoy doing, and it’s a habit of many typical latecomers to make a choice rather for the things they enjoy doing.

On the other hand, this fight does not have to be between the things we like and dislike doing. Sometimes such issues as obligation, duty, or even our instincts can come about. For example, some women can be late because they got set up for cleaning the apartment and do not want to be interrupted by anything else until the work is done. Or some bosses who tend to stay in the office long after working hours and go on working on one or another projects together with their subordinates. These people can’t stop their activities in the midstream because house cleaning or work supervising are really important things that should be done.

Therefore, those chronic latecomers who tend to listen to their impulses and mostly go in for what they enjoy or are obliged to do should learn interrupt their impulses. Sometimes it is connected with being more disciplined, sometimes it is connected with training their willpower. If you are the one who can’t stop doing the things you enjoy, the way to train your willpower can be practicing stopping your favorite entertaining or relaxing activities for a short while in order for your brain to get used to the idea of the interruption. Doing this everyday can help you be more focused on the things you have to do instead of doing what you like doing.

Do you know that our good-old excuses are the worst enemies on the way to self-discipline and effectiveness? We always say to ourselves “I have no time for this now”, or “It is not the time for this”, or “It is a worthless waste of time”, or “I have no money for this now”, etc. The main idea of all these excuses is doing nothing. In other words, these excuses help us to justify our laziness and inertness. It seems that there’s nothing new in what I am saying now, but give it a thought: how many times a day you use these excuses…

For example, you want to start doing exercises every day and give yourself a word to get up 30 minutes earlier in the morning and exercise. In your mind, you start picturing how your body is becoming more fit and stronger, and you are set up for positive results and new exciting changes in your life. However, when the alarm rings in the morning, you start thinking: “No, why so early? I’ll stay in the bed for just 5 more minutes, it is so warm here.. Well, I’d better exercise in the evening…” And, when you come back home in the evening after hard working day, what kind of exercise can you think about? Especially when it is your favorite show on the TV…

This goes on and on day by day. Every time you have some important problems to solve and things to do which will distract you from making important steps on the way to your goals. We repeat to ourselves that “we have no time for this now”, and in many situations, this way we avoid positive changes. Sometimes we get really used to all these bad things in our life and we are not trying to do anything to change our life for better. I know a lot of such people who go on complaining about their life, but when I offer several solutions for their problems, they just say that they do not have time for that. Therefore, they avoid the things that can change their life for better.

This way, our excuses make us give up solving our problems, that leads to personal degradation, depression, psychological disorders and so on. Our problems multiply and turn into real troubles. What to do? How to get out of this circle? You should look for power in yourself. If you really want to change something in your life, you can always do that. You will destroy your obstacles and achieve your goals no matter what. Do not think that tomorrow (the next week or the next month) you will have more time and opportunities to solve your problem. It is only one of those good-old excuses. What can hold you from making at least a little step to solving your problem right now?

Do those little steps and fight against your laziness, your apathy, uncertainty, fears and hesitations. It is always easier to postpone and procrastinate, but your problem will not be solved this way. When we are trying to solve our problems and overcome obstacles, we develop and progress. If you have a problem, you always have power and means for solving it. When you overcome the obstacle and solve your problem, you are becoming stronger and more powerful. The obstacles we overcome give us power! Remember this all the time, remember that you are a strong person and remember that there is always the way out!

Procrastination is a serious problem of many modern people, which actually goes several hundred years back and was troubling humanity centuries ago. St. Augustine, a Father of Latin church, who lived and worked in the IVth century, spent years in studying the issues related to procrastination. This concept helped St. Augustine to fight against his physical and mental temptations, that is why he was looking at positive sides of procrastination. Another famous scientist, Leonardo da Vinci,  was also a victim of this negative behavioral model. Due to his chronic delaying, lots of his paintings and bright technological ideas were left half-done. Mark Antonius, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, Douglas Adams, Agatha Cristie and many more of famous successful people were chronic procrastinators as well.

Why do we always start a new life or a cholesterol lowering diet tomorrow, not today? Why our kitchen should be cleaned right before important exams? Why we have a tendency to check out our e-mail messages every morning instead of coming straight to work? Why do we go on putting the things off even knowing about negative consequences of procrastination? A scientist from Canada Piers Steel, as associate Professor of industrial psychology at Haskayne School of Business (University of Calgary), studied these issues for more than 10 years, and his research ended up with creating a new concept called the Temporal Motivation Theory, publishing a wonderful book and a series of articles in the journal of the American Psychological Association.

“The heart of procrastination“, the specialist says, ” is an adaptive natural tendency to value today much more than tomorrow“. It is interesting that Steel decided to use a complex mathematical approach to the problem of putting things off and attempted to create a formula, which would define procrastination. The specialist claims that chronic delaying can be expressed by the following Procrastination Equation: U=EV/ID, where U is our desire to complete a certain task (or our drive to delay the completion). At that, E is expectancy to succeed at the task, V is the value of the completed task, I is the degree if urgency of the task and, finally, D is our individual sensitivity to delay.

After studying the subject both from theoretical and practical perspectives, Steel offers several innovative explanations of procrastination as a social phenomenon. The expert is convinced that the majority of today’s procrastinators (which, according to Steel, account up to 5% of today’s population) are not just lazy people who want to avoid doing the things they do not want to do. He says that such factors as our natural impulsiveness, a lack of self-knowledge or self-confidence,  an absence of strong motivation and our natural desire to see immediate results are among the main factors that contribute in development of this bad habit. The Temporal Motivation Theory, the procrastination equation and the study in general received positive reaction of many management specialists, who found it applicable to modern business leadership practices.

We always say “I have no time for this, I have no time for that…” However, many of us know so well that we spend a lot of time for noting. Watching TV and spending time in traffic jams are supposed to be the most common “time killers”. But, actually, there are so many more of them… Many of us have own sites or blogs, and the majority of such site owners are infected with the virus called “checking out the Statcounter“. Some of us tend to check out recent visitors activity every 15 minutes. What for? Certainly, to kill the time…

There are internal and external time killers. External ones include all factors or circumstances, which grab our attention easily and make us lose control of our time. The list of such time killers is quite long:

• Delays when leaving home (looking for the keys, etc.)
• Delays on the way to the work (traffic jams, etc.)
• Chatting with the colleagues
• Using MSN and other IMs
• Problems with the PC and Internet connection
• Looking through spam messages in your e-mail box
• Looking for files, pens, coffee cups, etc.
• Talking on the phone
• Vendors and visitors
• Smoking and coffee breaks
• Surfing on the net and reading various blogs
• RSS and various e-mail subscriptions, and so on

In addition to all those external time killers, there are also internal ones: all the factors connected with your personal traits which cause delays, problems at work, stresses and other unwanted side effects. Inner time killers are actually our habits and the parts of our life, therefore, it is usually harder to get rid of them. They commonly include such things as:

• Our inability to say “No”
• Our tendency to doing a lot of things at the same time
• Our inability to estimate the time necessary for competing one or another assignment
• Our desire to be useful and help everyone around us
• Our natural tardiness
• Our drive to communication
• Our neglect to making notes
• Our habit to start our work without thinking properly about all necessary resources
• Our inability to prioritize
• Our usual lack of normal sleep and rest
• Our habit to rely completely on our memory
• Our natural absence of mind
• Our habit to procrastinate and leave important tasks for the end of the day
• Our bad habits, such as smoking, snaking and so on.

The list is quite impressive, isn’t it? Some of these habits are sourced from our social norms of behavior. For example, if a colleague comes to ask for some little help, it is considered rude to refuse. Moreover, such factors are taken as parts of our working routine. However, sometimes we really waste a lot of time for walking along the corridor to prepare a drink, or looking for office-manager to get some blank paper sheets, etc.

Is it possible to get rid of all these time killers? Sure thing it is. But the key point is: in order to win the battle against time killers, it is necessary to fully understand the problem. We have to admit being dependent on time killers and acknowledge that they are really strong and powerful enemy to fight against. This understanding can help us to achieve maximum effectiveness and productivity. Remember that killing the “time killers” is a very important and necessary step toward effective time management and optimization.

Along with lack of motivation, such factors as vagueness, uncertainty and lack of clarity are among the key reasons of our bad habits, discouragement and procrastination. For those who are determined to fight with these problems and look for positive changes in their life, I would like to offer a strategy created by Dr. Brian Tracy, an experienced time management specialist, lecturer and business coach, who wrote several books of special techniques and recommendations for those who suffer from chronic procrastination and lack of personal effectiveness. He argues that everyone who wants to be successful in this world has to define own goals and aspirations. This can be done in the following 7 steps:

Step 1. Decide, what exactly do you want to achieve in this life, where do you want to be and what do you want to possess? Specifying your goals and your strategies to achieve them will help you in one important thing: to avoid doing useless, low value tasks and wasting your time and efforts. “One of the very worst uses of time is to do something very well that need not be done at all”, Tracy says.

Step 2. Think on paper. Try to write down at least 10 goals you want to achieve within the next year. Make them clear and crystallize them on paper. Now you see that by writing them down, your dreams and goals turned from fantasies into something tangible and real, didn’t they?

Step 3. Estimate an optimistic deadline and a pessimistic deadline for your goals. If your goal has no fixed time limits, it loses its relevance and urgency. You have to establish clear time frames for achieving your goals and assume the responsibilities not to procrastinate all the time, but work on this day by day.

Step 4. Think about everything you need to do, learn or accomplish in order to achieve your goals, and make a list of the findings. This will, definitely, make your goals closer to you. Also, this list will give you a picture of the most important or the largest tasks you need to accomplish on your way to every goal.

Step 5. Organize the list of the findings by priority and time sequence. You can use charts, boxes or circles. This plan will help you to increase your productivity and efficiency, so you will definitely be more successful than anyone who carries his goals in the mind.

Step 6. Take action! Find something that you can do right away in order to get closer to your goals at least for an inch. You can arrange a meeting with your future business partner, or find some important online information for your project. Do anything right away!

Step 7. Make a habit of doing something that will move you toward achieving your goals every single day. Learn something new every day, get engaged in specific activities or discussions, and involve more and more people in your projects. Keep moving forward and do not miss a day!

In my previous articles I was mentioning motivation as the main moving force for personal development and success. It is quite obvious that if a person is not enough motivated and challenged to do something, he or she will not struggle to succeed, as well as never feel sad for lost opportunities. Now, we are about to learn the second not less important factor which frequently causes our absolute indifference and poor self-discipline. This factor is lack of clarity: a lack of clear and specific goals, and lack of understanding what we want to achieve, when and in what way.

It is reported that only 3-5% of people have clear realistic written goals and objectives for their life. Such people are supposed to be more confident and more determined on their way to achieving those goals. They are also considered to be more reliable, more pragmatic and precise, and they usually have fewer problems with estimating the time for accomplishing their tasks. Finally, they are supposed to be more successful.

That is why time management specialists recommend to write down your specific long-term goals on a piece of paper, then write down your short-term goals, and then do all that “scheduling” thing, specify the deadlines for every step, etc. They say that this will be your roadmap to success. Well, this idea can sound useless and quite senseless to many people, especially to those who have some unclear and “standard” goals in their mind, like “I will buy a better car when I get paid for this project” or “I will start a diet and lose 10 pounds till the end of this year”. I understand those people, and I admit that they can live their life happily without any planning and scheduling on paper.

All I want to ask you now is just giving a clear answer to yourself: do you have some certain ambitions or aspirations in your life? What are you trying to achieve in this life? What is you life? Is it like going with the flow and sitting on fence, or like looking for something special and helping other people to feel comfortable in this world? Where do you want to be in 10 or 20 years? What do you need to do for that? It is not for scheduling or planning something, it is for yourself. Take a break from your daily routine for a minute, sit down and think about your future, your goals and reasons you live this life for. Also, try to understand that the clearer your goals are, the easier it will be for you to overcome your procrastination and laziness, learn being successful and find your place among the most productive people of your generation.

Putting the things off until later, next day, next Monday, next week-end or next month destroyed millions of interesting ideas, initiatives and innovations, ruined successful organizational strategies and ambitious careers, caused thousands of misunderstandings and crashed thousands of hopes.

As I have already stated before, knowing why we procrastinate is not the way to solve this problem. However, analyzing own addictive avoidance behavior and identifying possible reasons of your habit to escape from doing things is a must on the way to your total recovery from this disease. Certainly, our procrastination is closely linked to our inability to organize and plan our own activities in a rational way. However, the problem of procrastination always goes far beyond disorganization.

Let me list the most common reasons why we put off the tasks we have to do:

• Various fears of ours. This is the leading reason that motivates people to put off their tasks and, possibly, spend their time in looking for the ways to avoid doing those things. The fears include, first of all, fear of failure, fear of unpleasant experience and fear of frustration. Some procrastinators experience fear of success, because they do not want to assume the responsibility for their success and afraid that someone will tend to use their skills and talent, causing more and more loads and things to do.

• A tendency to perfectionism. This is a very important reason of our chronic procrastination. Many people tend to plan and think about making their work go smoothly or budgeting and doing everything possible for the projects to be done perfectly well. That usually causes huge delays in actual making the things done. Moreover, all the energy and creativity is usually spent for analyzing, therefore, sometimes there are no resources left for doing the task on time.

• Lack of motivation. Sometimes people delay doing their work because they are actually not willing to spend the efforts and resources for doing it. Maybe the work is too hard or the reward is too small. Lack of motivation is a serious factor that makes people procrastinate and fail to achieve good results.

• Inability to prioritize the tasks and structure the work that must be done. Many people procrastinate because they simply do not know where and how to start doing their tasks. They have no idea what must be done first and that’s why they always get lost. Or even worse: they misplace the priorities and start working on something really not important and usually very boring. The result is always the same: “I’ll finish doing this useless thing later on!”.

• Looking for crises. I have a friend who is certain that doing things under pressure always mobilizes and stimulates a person for achieving great results. That is why she usually does everything in the last minute.

• Failure to estimate own time and abilities. Some people underestimate the time necessary for their work that frequently causes putting this work off since it will not take much of time. Overestimating the time or other resources needed for a project also frequently leads to procrastination because of the feeling that the project will take too much of efforts or too much of time.

• Distractibility and tendency to fantasize. There are people who have problems with being concentrated on doing something for long time. Such people get distracted very easily and usually do several things in the same time, or jump from one activity to another because “something else has come up”. Moreover, very often they fantasize on doing something great and considerable, but never actually come to doing this – never in their life!

• Anger. Some procrastinators try to escape from doing their tasks because of their anger or feeling bad about the necessity to do those tasks. Undoubtedly, this does not lead to any positive results.

• Waiting for inspiration. Some people procrastinate because they are sure that for doing the work well they need to be in a good or special mood. However, sometimes such mood does not come for days…

• Laziness and seeking pleasure. Some people really do not care about the things that must be done.

In college, when I used to receive a task to write an essay and bring it to my instructor in 7 days, I was usually saying to myself: “Well, I have a plenty of time, I’ll be back to this assignment later on”. Two or three days after I used to think: “Maybe I should start dealing with the paper already?” The fifth day was always critical: by that time the necessity to start working on the assignment had been pressing a lot, therefore, I used to try imitating the work on the essay by creating a new file in my PC and looking through some related pages in the course book or in Internet. In the end of the ends, in the majority of the situations I was getting to the point in around 2-3 hours before the deadline. Chronic exhaustion, stresses, lack of success and personal progress, low self-esteem – those were the outcomes of my usual practice to put things off all the time.

Do I need to mention, in how many other ways the habit to procrastinate can affect your life? People can lose their businesses and fortunes, lose their friendships and destroy their lives because of procrastination. Unfortunately, a real danger of the problem of chronic procrastination has not been fully recognized by our society yet. Moreover, many specialists tend to connect this problem with time management and inability of a procrastinator to plan his/her time. This is a great misinterpretation of this problem, and trying to help procrastinators by giving them recommendations to improve their time management skills is a big mistake!

Some experts tend to define procrastination as “an addictive disorder”, or simply as an addiction. Yes, all procrastinators do have a strong addiction: they try to escape from doing the things they do not want or hate doing by one or another reason. Therefore, they choose to postpone doing things, like other addicts use substances to postpone dealing with mental or psychological problems they face. As a solution for the problem of putting things off all the time, many psychologists offer looking for a reason of your procrastination and trying to eliminate it. Well, do you believe that it is really going to work? No way! Chronic procrastination is something like alcoholism or drug abuse: will an alcoholic stop drinking if he finds the reason that has brought him to drinking?

As I could observe, all chronic procrastinators have a cyclic way of living with their problem. Usually, when they figure out that their life has become unmanageable and their habit of putting things off is getting out of their hand, they start feeling guilty about their helplessness or not doing anything to change their habit. They check out information on the net or look for some books and articles related to the problem, learn all those easy tips on how to get rid of chronic procrastination, and make up their mind to start a new life without procrastination. Next morning they make a list of the things thy need to do, schedule everything very precisely and feel very proud of their work! Yes, sometimes they even have enough of willpower to complete some first tasks on that list! Finally, they think: “Hey, that was a good start! I got a great progress!” And after this – everything goes on the same way as it was before: panic before the deadlines in school, doing the work in the last minute, being late and frustrated.

This example is quite an illustrative picture. Real chronic procrastination is a very hard problem – probably, the hardest one that we will have to fight with. Getting rid of this terrible habit is connected with a very responsible approach to SAYING what you are going to do and DOING what you have said. That is why a huge motivation will be necessary. But I’ll tell you what: do not wait till you have “a dentist situation”, when your delays of going to the dentist have led you to the necessity to remove all your decaying teeth and replace them with implants. Getting the job done on time is much easier and more pleasant, isn’t it?