I am Always Late

Parents very often have to deal with tardy kids. This problem is very common and even the brightest and the most successful children may be infected with the bacteria of chronic tardiness. As a rule, the problem reaches its peak in the mornings, when the child needs to get up early, have breakfast and make all necessary preparation for going to school. There are many effective techniques and tactics with can be used by parents to assist their kids in fighting against developing chronic tardiness. However, the best way to combat the problem is to unite the efforts with school teachers and administrators.

Most of the schools have very strict policies about the student who are chronic latecomers, making children learn to be responsible for their behavior. Some schools offer the system of rewards and incentives for being on time and never missing classes. Below, check out some tips on what can parents do to help their kind combat chronic procrastination and a tendency to being always late.

1. Do not tolerate your kid’s tardiness. Make your child understand that he’s got a problem which is now small but can turn into something very serious and possibly ruin his whole life. Develop a system of penalties like imposing new chores in addition to usual household responsibilities of your child, or cut your kid’s allowance for 50-80 cents for being tardy in the morning. Do not fall for lame or imaginative excuses: children are very good in creating those.

2. Take a close look at the problem. Is your kid having problems only because of being unable to get out of bed early in the morning? Does he tend to put off tasks and procrastinate? What causes this problem? Too busy or hectic schedules, or the child’s own mind? Maybe he hates school and tries to spend as less time there is possible? Or maybe he is just trying to grab your attention? Pinpoint the roots of your kid’s tardiness, and it’ll be easier for you to create the best strategy for overcoming the problem.

3. Make your kid revise his sleep routine. Be sure that your child sleeps as much as it necessary for the child of his age. Help him to develop a habit of waking up early and explain that those who get up early have less troubles with keeping track of the day. If your child needs to be at his class at eight, let him wake up 6:30 and he’ll have plenty of time for doing morning exercises, having a good breakfast and get himself ready for the day. Set the official time for going to bed as well.

4. Let your kid learn following schedules and setting up goals. Talk to your child and explain the advantages of scheduling and planning daily activities. Help him in creating his own schedule and do not forget to take into account your child’s pace of doing his daily tasks. Give good time frames for completing one of another task or assignment.

5. Create incentives to help your child following the schedules. Be aware about how your child managed with following his schedule and making efforts of being on time. Always praise him and reward your kid for being (or at least trying to be) punctual and develop his discipline muscle. You should use individual reward system to motivate every child for achieving better results.

Some of us are lucky to mainly have more or less punctual people around, the people who value their time and the time of others. Some of us have two-three occasional latecomers around, who are very often late and make other people nervous waiting for quite long time. And there are  sometimes real chronic latecomers who are always late and mainly do not feel any guilt and always find reasons to justify such behavior of theirs. Some of them justify their habit of being late by so called “being fashionably late” for 10-15 minutes. But is this always just a point of fashion, or can there be something else behind such behavior?

The truth is: many experts are convinced in the fact that those who are always “fashionably” late actually consciously choose to be late and make other wait. Julie Morgenstern, one of the famous specialists on time management and the problems of chronic lateness, says that there are very conscious reasons behind being always 10-15 minutes late.

“If you are literally always 10 minutes late, it’s psychological,” she says. What can be the most common reasons behind such behavior? Be it a search for receiving love and respect from other people, or an attempt to underline own importance, or an approach to showing how busy you are, or a way to crate a new crisis-like situation and receive an adrenalin rush, be sure that other people will not be willing to wait for you always and without questions. And no excuses like traffic jams, stolen money or broken car will work for you.

It is interesting that in many situations, being “fashionably late” also applies to many other issues and activities. For example, some people like being a little late with finalizing their monetary issues, like paying their debts or rent. Those who have this unhealthy habit, or those who have to deal with the type of people who always choose to be late, should be reminded (or remind the latecomers) that in order to live a happy and successful life, it is a must to honor your commitments, to show respect to other people, and show up on time. Otherwise people will tend to avoid you, and your bad habit can cause you your job, your partner, and possibly your happy life.